Christmas Past Collides with Christmas Present

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The jail visits continue to be difficult. Buddy is a good actor. He’s very brave as he gets into the van with the transporter, dutifully goes to the visit to see his bio-mom and then returns to daycare a little wild but himself. Once he gets home the meltdown begins. There has been screaming at the top of his lungs, flinging ornaments off the Christmas tree, rice and corn flying through my dining room, tantrums about getting dressed and terrors in the night. But we’re complying with a court order, so it’s ok (say the people who don’t have to deal with the damage that’s being done).

We met with the caseworker today and she said that the judge cannot make the decision of giving bio-mom another chance with Buddy just because she is doing the programs in jail. So that was good to hear. It was up to social services to say that rights should be terminated. Now when we go to TPR on the 7th, bio-mom can either do the right thing and sign over her rights or go to trial. We will most likely go to trial. The hearing would be around March. There are only a handful of people to testify, so hopefully that will move quickly. Also, by that point Buddy will have been with us for over a year and we can hire a lawyer to speak for us. I still have fingers crossed for adoption in the summer.

During the good times, Buddy and I made Christmas cookies and wrapped some presents. We’ve been singing Christmas carols and watching the specials on TV. He’s still a little unsure of the logistics of how the whole deal with Santa works, but he’ll find out soon enough. My family will be coming to our house Christmas Eve for dinner and gifts. On Christmas Day we’ll go to my aunt’s and see the Great Grandparents. Hopefully he won’t be too crazy with all that’s going on over two days. Change in routine + overstimulation = meltdowns & getting up multiple times during the night.

To all the foster parents out there, I wish you the best through this joyous but difficult time of the year and to everyone a Very Merry Christmas!

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