He’s Very Two

Darth Buddy getting into Daddy's books.

Darth Buddy getting into Daddy’s books.

When asked recently how old Buddy is, I responded that he is “very two!” He doesn’t listen, runs everywhere, says “I don’t want to,” needs kisses for old boo boos and his latest trick is spitting out food. When he sleeps though, he’s an angel!

Until recently, Buddy has been a good eater. At daycare, he’s awesome and will do anything that the other kids do. He always devours everything on his plate. At home, he would at least eat the meat and would at least try the vegetable and side. Lately, we’re lucky if he has more than 3 bites of anything without spitting it back out. Foods he likes one day, he spits out the next. I’m assuming it’s just another part of his defiance/independence/terrible twos phase. However, the child needs to eat! I’ve tried being a good role model. “Mommy is almost done with her rice. Mmmm, it’s so good.” I’ve tried making a deal with him. “If you eat 5 bites of chicken you can watch Dora!” I’ve tried threats. “If you don’t eat some of your dinner, you can’t go out and play.” I’ve tried separating out his food so they don’t mix together and I’ve tried making it colorful. Hmmmm…

He has also decided that he’s going to be outright defiant. I was cooking dinner and he came over by the stove. I told him to be careful, it’s dangerous. He came over again and I said, “No, it’s hot!” and I showed him where the flame comes up. He still came over and put his little finger on the stove anyway! He had quite a few time-outs that day. He also must think he’s a teenager because he’d stand with the fridge open, looking in. Are you hungry? No. Are you thirsty? No. Then get out of the refrigerator!

The other thing lately is his obsessing over boo boos. That, I know, is part of his anxiety. The cat gave him a tiny scratch on his hand. We heard about that for over a week. A girl at daycare pulled his ear and he continuously harped about it. He had a bug bite that was just healed up, but he continued to touch and scratch at it and wanted medicine for weeks afterward. He also scratches at his face at night, almost like he wants to cause a boo boo so he can touch it.

Some of these things I know are just part of being two and his desire for free will and hopefully, he’ll grow out of it. However, I can’t help but wonder if it will develop into something more serious. I know foster children are an anxious bunch and need time to heal their wounds, both physical and emotional. You really have to “live in the now” with foster care. You can’t dwell on the past and you can’t worry about the future. You just have to take each day as another adventure. I do my best to be a good parent, provide consistency and love and hope for the best for my little man!

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